With so much of our environment changing in the springtime, we are reminded of the constant growth that exists in the families we see everyday. Case Manager Melissa Hand details her understanding of growth as she works with children. biological families, and foster families in our Residential Services Program.
Our motto here at Chambliss Center for Children is, “Growing young lives, 24-7-365”. We love to help children, individuals, and families grow through our supportive services. Growth can be beautiful, but can also be very difficult. I’d like you to think back on a time where you faced changes, or realized you needed some self-improvement in an area of your life, whether for personal, relational, or work reasons. Remember the process and effort it took to make this change to restore a relationship or to gain a new skillset, behavior or habit? Now, let’s look at growth from the perspective of the families we serve through the Residential Services Program at Chambliss Center for Children. We aim to assist families and youth in positive growth, in order to make families whole… but what does this look like? Of course, we serve children and ensure their safety and provision through our amazing foster homes, but we also aid the child’s family, since our goal is always reunification if possible.
First, we see broken and hurting people who are in a season of loss, grief, trauma, and depression. (winter, if you will.) We come on the scene and create a plan for the family, which involves asking them to give up their “normal”, because growth begins with pruning away the unhelpful parts. Some of these things include unhelpful parenting patterns, substance addictions, and unresolved mental health concerns. These things take time to correct and heal, and is not as simple as “removing” the problem, but also requires providing patience for recovery.
“…growth begins with pruning away the unhelpful parts.”
Next, for these lifestyle changes to develop and be maintained, there must be a season of pouring into the family with resources, support, patience, mentoring and training (spring rain comes to mind). Sometimes this looks like their case worker connecting them to other agencies for treatment, giving them transportation to appointments, or simply letting them know that we believe in them even if others don’t. People who lack a healthy support system generally have less likelihood of success. Pain is often associated with growth. Pain for our families can look like relapse, losing the job they’ve only had for two months, and struggling to find adequate housing, all during the process of trying to prove themselves worthy to raise their own children.
Our best-case scenario comes when families take these resources and support and make the effort to gain real, long-term changes in order to be reunified as a healthier, stable and safe family. Sometimes, the growth required for this is too difficult, due to these parents having gone through many years of personal trauma, addiction, and poverty, which cannot be overcome easily or quickly. Sometimes, it is too much to overcome in the time we are allowed to give them, which is typically 12 to 15 months. In that case, our wonderful foster parents often become adoptive parents, because in the end, it is the child’s well-being that takes priority.
As a Case Manager, I love to see families grow and heal, especially when the odds seem stacked against them. Even when reunification is not possible, I hope to see all parents and their children become healthier through the process, as we at Chambliss Center for Children recognize that they matter, regardless of their history. This is why we continuously need patient, kind, and understanding foster parents to come alongside us to care for the children and to also provide a positive example and cheerleader for their biological parents. This type of foster parent almost always promotes a healthier outcome for the child.
If you, or someone you know, would be willing to help children and families grow and heal, please contact us at fostercare@chamblisscenter.org or call 423.693.2580 for more information today.
Written by:
Melissa Hand, LMSW
Case Manager